ITT: Pretend we are still writing in osu! OT

Aurani · ^

You people still haven't learned the difference between me and Anus, tsk tsk, I feel insulted.

So how long are we gonna talk about things that I don't want to be reminded of?

Koma · ^

Granger wrote:

Glad it was so easy for you tho.
t. Person diagnosed with sevre chronic depression.

<3 u too bb, we care about you

Aurelianus Augustus wrote:

Idk what you did, but good job mate, I'd tap your shoulder if I could. :V

Story time? Story time.

So that was like three or four years ago when I was going to my school (which I graduated two years ago) and I was diagnosed with some form of autism (albeit not a really disqualifying one, it's like so fucking mild that you might as well never notice I'm autistic at all besides some awkward quirks and rituals), my class was going on a trip to a good hotel in Croatia and I was still underage at the time so I prepared everything accordingly, filled out all the paperwork and paid the needed amount of money, all was going good until suddenly I have been called by the school principal only to be told that "my attendance is no longer possible".

I ask them what the fuck is going on and they say "we couldn't find a person who'd assist you during the trip because we know how difficult it is for autistic people to perform social tasks, so unfortunately we had to exclude you from the trip" and my reaction was not really a pleasant one, I asked them if they really think I need someone who'd spoonfeed me and wipe my ass throughout the entire thing and they were going on defensive mode that the money will be paid back and shit, but anyway it ended up in me saying "Fuck you" to the school principal (and I even got away with it) and my day was fucking screwed.

I got back home fucking pissed and due to being autistic back in the time I had some bodily ticks like kicking things away and lashing out on literally nothing, so I swinged my legs in my room doing shit like battle stances but when I was doing one big swing, our family dog (who was getting old as fuck, grey hair on nose, deaf and that stuff) walked right into my room and my leg accidentally hit him. In his chest or somewhere close to his heart. And my mom saw it all. Dog ran away from room but suddenly started pissing himself on the floor spazzing and twitching while his tongue was out on the side of his cheek, all while my brain was having a hard time processing all that happened.

"OH FUCK BARRY'S DYING CARRY HIM TO DOG AMBULANCE OR SOMETHING" my dad drove in and carried him to his car, mom and sister got in but I wanted to stay at home because I didn't really know what was happening, once they got back after an hour or so, mom and sister said doctors were unable to save him, that was pretty fucked up for a while and I felt kinda guilty about it and I talked to my psychiatrist about it and after a few sessions I agreed that I couldn't have stopped it given my mental state back then so I just carried on and started to take exceptional care of our cat, the other pet who was around.

In the end the biggest fuss was made by my mom and sister not about the dead dog but about the fucking 200 € they had to pay for his incineration wtf
pathology/10

Last edited by Koma (2016-07-28 14:39:44)

Aurelianus Augustus · ^

Granger wrote:

Aurani you're such an ass.
Maybe he, as example didnt know chocolate is highly toxic to dogs and fed it to him cause its such a nice treat? Stuff like that... Toppled over some heavy stuff and it fell on the dog?

Of course I'm an ass, I can't help but being an ass in this world.

I fed my doggo chocolate before and he sure as fuck didn't mind, although he didn't like it too much. So unless the guy fed him 2 kilos worth of chocolate, it can't have been the cause of the death, because that would be stupid.
If he dropped something on a dog that's of a small breed or is a pup, then yeah, my apologies, but that's highly unlikely - he probably ran over the dog with something.

Hika wrote:

It's alright guys, Sinisha is just very misunderstood, please ignore him and hopefully he'll die off somewhere in a hole, preferably with me and hopefully forever. He has a weird sense of humor, and I'm not sure where it comes from.

Too bad my real name is Michael.
Also I don't swing that way baby, not in threesomes and up. :V

Pirtelö · ^

Aurelianus Augustus wrote:

Hika wrote:
It's alright guys, Sinisha is just very misunderstood, please ignore him and hopefully he'll die off somewhere in a hole, preferably with me and hopefully forever. He has a weird sense of humor, and I'm not sure where it comes from.
Too bad my real name is Michael.
Also I don't swing that way baby, not in threesomes and up. :V

no it's mickey

Hika · ^

why the fuck do u have to pay so much to kill a dog wtf
tha'ts literally all i have to ask from what i read

Mahogany wrote:

sorry if I came across wrong

I completely understood you, not so much other people but yeah, it really does help kind of 'freeze' your mind from going insane so you can help rebuild yourself in the process

like i know that when i took my antidepressants (i was on prozac and abilify), I went to bed late as fuck but no matter what, I woke up exactly at 6, even if i had work at 13/14. I literally felt immune to everything. I remember one day my car swerved in the middle of the road because of heavy rains and stuff and I literally just put the car back on track and kept going. didn't give a single fuck. I used to walk outside late as fuck at night, and knowing that at the time i was an 18 Y/O, SKINNY AS FUCK FEMALE, i still did risky shit.

antidepressants are evil

EDIT: I'm pretty sure i did my age math wrong becuase i'm 20 so i meant to say 19 w/e

Last edited by Hika (2016-07-28 14:43:56)

enet · ^

From here forth I bestow Pedorani with the name Mickey mouse. May the neighbouring kingdoms praise your name as you rape their children.

Hika · ^

Fuck you, only I can name him.

Also i'm lonely on TS. Someone keep me company.

Granger · ^

Wtf man you dosages must have been much lower than mine. I pretty much was zombie mode. Not doing anything until ordered and then doing only that until im told something else.

Fuck that. Never again. NEVER.

Aurelianus Augustus · ^

The only time I took antidepressants was when I was around my worst for about 2 months and tbh they weren't too bad. They were the type that forced you to be happy, which was kind of amusing - still feeling like shit inside while having a pretty nice facade of happiness. They helped quite a bit actually, since people stopped being pesky and asking what's wrong and reminding me of it instead of leaving it alone.

Hika · ^

Granger wrote:

Wtf man you dosages must have been much lower than mine. I pretty much was zombie mode. Not doing anything until ordered and then doing only that until im told something else.
Fuck that. Never again. NEVER.

My psychiatrist started me off at 20MG then knocked me down to 10MG.
The 20MGs was my peak and then when she kicked me down, I kinda died and started realizing I didn't need it. For like the first two weeks I was on the higher dose, I stopped crying and started doing things in a minimal manner. So I guess we were in the same boat?

Granger · ^

I guess?

I dont even remember how high my dosages were...
Hey maybe im actually not depressed anymore and my lack of motivation for anything and general numbness, emotionlessness is actually because the meds fucked my anally brain without lube.

Hika · ^

That's what it usually is. I know my roommate told me he used to be on meds and he said he was always super happy and got the happy high. I'm not sure how he felt that cause I felt completely mindless in everything I did :p

Aurelianus Augustus · ^

Those meds alter the chemicals that affect your brain so you ARE happy, but only because you're forced to be - it feels like it's the only emotion available to you, even though you can clearly think of how "fucked up your life is".

UnderminE · ^

Hika wrote:

example: I have absolutely no idea what happened in the month of July 2015. I just can't remember it and that's really sad because that's the part of my life I want to remember so I would hope it wouldn't happen again but apparently antidepressants suck and make you feel numb as shit when you take them for extended periods of time.

In my case it's the worse when people call me a retarded because I don't remember most of the so called important things happened in my life. What if those "important things" were all traumatic things? Sometimes I wish I could remember them, but actually I'm glad I don't. Or else I'd feel bad every day, every moment. Don't worry, whenever you are about to make a mistake those memories just appear for a second in your mind and remind you of the bad experiences you've had before.

I remember my friend using those. He was both laughing and crying at the same time. It must be horrible.

Last edited by UnderminE (2016-07-28 15:38:46)

Hika · ^

I'm retarded, totally forgot they're called serotonin reuptake inhibitors

UnderminE wrote:

Sometimes I wish I could remember them, but actually I'm glad I don't. Or else I'd feel bad every day, every moment. Don't worry, whenever you are about to make a mistake those memories just appear for a second in your mind and remind you of the bad experiences you've had before.

#words to live by

thanks Miney, you're awesome. maybe it's good I don't recall stupid shit like that.
all in all, i'm p happy with my life, excluding the fact i'm losing my second job from a shitty back injury.

Last edited by Hika (2016-07-28 15:40:13)

^ #11326 2016-07-28 14:35:24

Re: ITT: Pretend we are still writing in osu! OT

^ #11327 2016-07-28 14:36:41

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